now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
