fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I want to fling myself into the sun
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
