I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
false alarm. still invincible.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
