you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
