Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
This girl is more easily done than said...
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
