You smell like stripper and shame
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
