fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize