He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
