Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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