he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
