No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
