then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
