She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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