It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
