On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
