dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize