So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
