Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
