dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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