now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
