nut hugger
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
why do cheetos always look like penises
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
