She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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