I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
