I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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