I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
