On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
