White coat. Heels.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
