smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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