i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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