Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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