You work out of a Hotel?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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