Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
