When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
