its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize
