How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Randomize
