I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize