question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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