Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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