I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
