WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
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