all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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