Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
