I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
How's work?
Spinning.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
