And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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