How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
