walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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