My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
