We got so high we made milksteak
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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