First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
are you so shy because you have an std?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
