Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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