She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Randomize
