The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
