Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
This is the high leading the old right now
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Randomize