Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
